Light-No flame

Those dreams of darkness, I will always need their presence to let me know that this is filth, we are filth, we are a plague, we are dirt, we are a little more than nothing. This is the dark side...the dark side of the sun. Right now I'm asking myself, what the fuck, this doesn't make any sense, how can I be here? What's the fucking beginning? WHAT IS THE FUCKING BEGINNING?
Nothing fulfills me...well...you do...nobody else does. And this feeling of doubt about everyone and everything else makes me question a lot of things that to me will never have an answer. I must die to find out...but not now please, I'm having the time of my life.
I can't look into the sky, I'm afraid of the fucking stars, I can't look at them, DON'T MAKE ME LOOK MOTHERFUCKER OR I'LL KILL YOU! I'm afraid of the dark, I'm afraid of things I can't control, I'm stupid...really stupid...but something has to give...and when you come...the fright disappears.
I can't move! I can't move! Rotting Christ is coming to fucking Portugal, Mangualde and I don't give a fuck about that. My mobile phone is waiting for a message, I'm waiting for someone, yes, you. Jesus, I've missed you here...I don't believe Jesus is the messiah, kill the man! Kill the man! Where's the torch with the flames? The structure of archetype made me what I am. Am I making any sense bitch? Is this for real? What has just happened this past weeks? For the first time, I wanna go out to the street at 2 am, let's ride a bike shall we? It must be pretty amazing to contemplate the night and the lights in the city...because beyond that...only darkness appears...SOGB